Sports

Before college, I don't think there wasn't a prolonged period of time when I wasn't playing some sort of sport, whether it be soccer, baseball, volleyball, or football. I was a very active student during high school, but for some reason, since I've come to Stony Brook I've barely played any sports what so ever which is a little odd if you think about it.

I played soccer almost my whole life up until i was 18, only taking a short break when I was 10, and then realized I missed it and then joined again. I played on the highschool team and a travel team that sort of died down during my junior and senior year in highschool. For the highschool team during my Junior year, we were in the 2nd division of the top conference, and made it to the playoffs where we played another team that was in our division, even though they believed that they should have been a division higher and this was their time to show it. Unfortunately for them however, they lost to us in the playoffs, but we only played one more game before we were eliminated by a division 1 team.

The next year, my Senior year, we got bumped up to division 1 which to be honest, we really shouldn't have been apart of. Alot of seniors had graduated the previous year, and we had alot of unproven talent on our team. However, all D-1 teams in that Conference made the playoffs, so my coach accepted the offer. I played goalie and after a few losses that year and without much goals scored, my morale was so that I felt that once I let in a goal, the game was over. My teammates view it as me giving up, which in reality I was, but I was tired of getting beat up for a lost cause especially since we already were in the playoffs. This proved to be a very bad thing as we ended up losing our first game in the playoffs to a lower division team that we completely outplayed and lost on an own goal from one of my defenders.

I haven't played soccer since, and regret my senior year of soccer to this day.

This is Madness: Rational Insanity

The subject of madness is something that interests me greatly. I think that in order to be truly brilliant one needs to have just a touch of madness. To me, madness doesn’t mean incompetence. Of course if someone is too far out side social norms of thinking he loses his ability to function in society. But, if one is able to take just one step back from reality, he finds the ability to consider new possibilities for the world. One does not have to look too hard to find examples correlating creativity and madness. Take Van Gogh, considered a genius even after cutting off part of his own ear. This is of course an extreme. In order to create, to invent something new, we need to lose touch somewhat with present reality. If we never step outside our boundaries, all we can do is recycle old ideas. I think it is important for people to question their own sanity. How can we hope to see the world through the eyes of another if we never question the vision of our own? It’s my opinion that sanity and rationality are two separate attributes. One can be so far outside the conventional norms that they are considered insane, but if you follow their thought you might discover that it flows logically. Such a person might even be aware of their own madness and be able to tell you exactly why he is insane. I would give this person a label of rational insanity. Take on the other hand, one who follows society’s standards without waver, but never questions anything, lives the unexamined life, accepts whatever his is told, a sheep, a zombie. Such a person is clearly sane, but question the validity his sanity, ask him why he is sane, he will have no answer. To me, this is irrational sanity, sanity without reason.

Dan Gulino #3 Foul Language

Why do people find foul language so offensive and vulgar to begin with? Do these words exist in our english language just to curse or or insult others? I say that these words exist mostly to allow it's users to vent frustration with passion, which in turn can be helpful for its users.
However, are "curse words" used in place of a word that it's user cant replace? Can the user not find anything else better to say than all the 4 letter bombs? I think yes, and therefore think that I personally need to find new vocabulary to fill in these vulgar holes in my everyday speech. Just a thought...
-GulinoGanders

funding opportunities

These are two funding opportunities for working on relationship between Korea and other countries. I'll be working on the application with my professor soon.

Discuss your first love and first kiss.

Though this is a few days late, I figured I'd make a Valentine's Day post. This is about my first love and some of its obstacles. Reminiscing about my first crush on Valentine's Day only seemed natural.

My first love would be one that took the longest to get over. We had met when I was in first or second grade from our mutual bff, Ben. At that time, we were 6 or 7, a time when boys had cooties and lots of silly teasing went about. Craig was a jerkface then, but I hung around him because of Ben. We used to play these pretend games where we had cute personas and characters, I was Princess Monk Monk, a nickname I was given after I was Princes Leia for Halloween in second grade. Craig was Junior, Ben was.. Benny? Lame. But yeah. We used to have all these crazy scenarios of things attacking us, missions and outdoor adventures. I used to act like I hated Craig as a kid, but I never did.

It wasn’t until middle school where Craig and I started talking to each other without our group of friends. It started on AIM, where for the first time, he stopped being a jerk always teasing and actually started to talk to me as a civilized human. My parents had started fighting that year and I began to open up to him about my personal matters. I mean, we always got along with each other, even if half of it was play fighting and teasing, it was only natural for me to feel comfortable enough to open up to him.

We used to spend our Fridays at the Canteen and Rock Lobsters, local bands playing shows and a place where middleschool punk-ass kids hung out. (Oh, I was so badass… yeah right). But it was a place to hang out with my friends on Friday nights. We started spending more time with each other. My feeling for him grew bigger and stronger, but I was too afraid to admit to any of it. I honestly can’t tell you how it all played out anymore… Which is sad considering this story used to play out in my head like a broken record. I’d have to go back an reread my Livejournal if I really wanted to remember all the details.

I remember one night, he gives me his journal he wrote in. He wasn’t very good with expressing his feelings and thoughts in person. Much of our important conversations took place online. But he gives me his journal, I spent that night reading through it. In which he confesses his feelings for me. Somehow after that we start going out.

Our first kiss would be at Emily’s house a few months after we started dating. We were in her basement hanging out with others. It was a Christmas party. We sat together on the couch, and eventually he came in for a kiss. I must’ve melted into a goo of just cheesy cheese from happiness and butterflies. That Christmas I was also given a present I could never forget. First was a necklace and a stuffed animal of a frog, then the best present of them all; A cassette tape with a song he wrote and played for me, “Belly Button”. Cutest fucking thing ever. The tape still sits in my radio at home… Every once in awhile I play it, and it never fails to bring a smile to my face.

Our relationship would continue for several months. Until my crazy teenage angst and melodrama became too much to handle for him. Our break up was somewhat messy, I was devastated and upset. We got back together a month later initially. Then broke up again another month in. I started dating another guy for a few weeks, and broke up with the new boy to get back to Craig, yet again. The whole on-again, off-again continued over the course of two years.
Despite having dated other guys, I always thought about Craig. I was finally getting over him, and sophomore year in high school he finds his way back into my life. How did that even start? I remember sneaking out of my house night after night just to spend hours aimlessly driving about and talking. Nothing ever came of that situation besides my feelings being stirred up again. This was over the winter break. School started again, and we kinda just went back to how things were. Come spring again, and things started yet again. He wound up in the hospital one night and since I had lived a few blocks from the hospital I spent a good deal of time keeping him company. Then his ex, the one he broke up with me for, came back into his life, they got back together, I walked away from the whole thing. Went away to college… Six years later and I still thought about him.

It wasn’t until Emily told me about his coke addiction in college that I finally got over him. It’s not like we talked much then or saw each other. He just never left the back of my mind. I had this fantasy and perfect image of him and who he was all in my mind. The reality of his coke addiction is what knocked some sense into me and allowed my dream image of him to shatter and finally move on. I hope he’s still not badly relying on coke, I hope he’s happy in his new relationship, I hope he’s found happiness with his life. I’m sorry I was always too timid to make a move and even admitting my feelings properly. Our whole shitshow of a relationship was ruined because of me being a confused, angsty teenager. I feel slightly bad that his coke addiction wasn’t something I wanted to help him through. I actually wanted no part of it, and that’s what finally made getting over him possible.

Today, we run into each other every few months… when I go home to Glen Cove and shop at CVS when he happens to be working. Too bad he never quite fit my fantasy of him. Instead, I’m disappointed in who he’s become because I know he could’ve been so much more. But I guess such is life.

The difference between a set of acrobatic moves and an art form.

I started b-boying/break dancing around 2 years ago in senior year high school as a club activity. At first at did it cause my friends were there and I need to meet the school's requirement to earn enough extracurricular activities. I soon came around to love this form of dancing or even an form of dancing. What amazes me is that even bboys out there are still rocking out and holding up on college or even medical and law school.
Now bboy does have it's own fundamentals. Over the years it has evolved with many new moves. However many people who are amazed by it fail to see the art form behind it and are just amazed by flips. If you bring someone new to the scene to a jam and people cheer when the person moves to the beat or as we say it kills the beat, he would question why cheer when he didn't do any moves that involve flips or acrobatic feat.
Now I of course breaking still involves power moves. But it's still an art form and like all dances one should move to the music and digest it using his or her body. It takes one to accomplish and master a move but to be able to add your own style to your dancing is something one should master in breaking and any other art form like drawing, writing,etc. This allows one to express themselves and show others who you really are.

Spring is here...

Not quite yet. But today’s weather certainly felt like a good spring day. It was a good day with the warm heat of the beaming sun, beautiful clear sky, and a slight breeze. The snow is slowly melting away creating puddles along the road.

I love this weather because winter is not fully over and this is like a preview of what spring has to offer in a couple of weeks. I think this weather is perfect for waking in the morning and is more pleasing to walk in than in the freezing cold. I cannot wait until spring is official here and when the animals pop out to complete the picture perfect image of nature.

To add to the happiness of this weather is that this week is showing signs of having good temperatures around the upper forties. So if anyone is thinking of doing anything this week is a great week to be doing sports or other outdoor activities. This week is a great treat compared to the mountain of snow that got dumped on us in January.

Whats love got to do with it?

Love makes any good story into a great story. It makes food taste better, it can even make anything else seem unimportant. Its what makes the world go around, its what launches wars against nations, its what people live and die for. Without love, life wouldn't be worth living. Its what we fight for everyday in our lives whether it be our love for another person or for what we do. Its what makes us wake up in the morning and fall asleep. Its also what makes a few of us insomniacs.

A wise man once told me that the opposite of love isn't hate but indifference. It took me awhile to understand it, love and hate are both a strong feeling towards something or someone. Indifference is having no feelings at all, so wouldn't be better to be loved and hated than to not be cared about at all? Love has everything to with it.

Dads and kids

Today's conversation in class was very informative. It had me thinking about a lot of things. Specifically, the picture with the guy holding his child in a very nonchalant and confused way was the one that caught my attention. The first thought that came to my mind when watching that picture was how different that is from my own dad. My dad was always there for me in terms of being loving and cherishing. In fact, when I saw that picture, I had the initial belief that things like that don't really go on in today's society compared to societies of the past.

But then I tried to have an open mind about the situation. I knew that everyone's dad was not like my own, and that some people had fathers that were maybe not as hands on. Then what immediately came to mind was the show, "Everybody Loves Raymond." Ray's father, Frank is someone who basically didn't have any kind of input in terms of raising his kids. He was just in the background while his wife did most of the work. But what is interesting here is that Ray is kind of the same way as his father. When it comes to his own kids, there are times when he makes an effort to take part in raising them. But it is very apparent that Ray doesn't really have a big role in raising his kids. He goes to work, comes home, eats, and maybe does some more work as home. This drew significant parallels to what we talked about in class and the picture that was shown. It just had me thinking.