sleep? what's that

So if you saw my V-log or vlog Whatever it's called... I have been stuck in these really messed up sleep cycles. 24+ hours awake and 4-5 asleep every day. since last wednesday. i know it's terrible but it's interesting the world is moving so quickly around me. After a certain amount of time awake reality starts to feel like a dream but when I go to sleep i am not happy so i wake up and stay up for another 24+ hours. it's probabally gonna kill me in the end but... it's kinda worth it to be awake to see the sunrise and set then rise again is a really calming. watching over roth pond while no one is around is truly a treat. no skateboarders no screaming drunk bitches no nothing. Just me the occational duck swimming by and the pond. slowly my body starts to shut down... i start seeing things and feeling things that arn't there it's truly surreal. it's like a virtual world where everything is beautiful and there is no ugly in the world my worst enemy could be my bestfriend. i honsetly do not know what else to write. my fingers are like little snakes dancing across the keyboard. they feel so weird. this dreaming while still awake thing is too crazy

Living Zombie

I've been moving through my day like a listless zombie. Barely awake and not interacting or even reacting to my surroundings. My thoughts are becoming foggy and the professor is now tuned out to nothing but a mere muffle. I know the majority of my posts talk about school work, but it's the only thing I know nowadays. My parents have made it very clear to me that my full time occupation is a student.

It's funny how sometimes I think I make more sense when I'm writing as I'm half awake, but I think that's just delirium talking right now. I'm just counting down the minutes 'til I can have my next coffee. I'm not used to this sleep deprivation for the semester, but this week has been jam packed with projects, homework, and midterms to study for. I know that even though I'm tired now, I'll probably get a second wind soon. I hate this because it tricks my body into thinking I don't need to sleep when in reality I am in desperate need of it.

Is this what it's like to be the living dead? Not truly dead, but not truly alive either. Everything is a blur, eyelids are heavy...